I'm going to write some things that i think here
About a month ago now i got a new phone....... a New Old Phone that is. i purchased a "nokia 2780 flip." Lately i have been thinking a lot about my relationship with technology. i love computers but it feels like a lot of us are just too connected all the time and it has started to be overwhelming. In my quest to reduce screen time, i've tried plenty of methods like app timers and putting my phone on grayscale but it is just so difficult, because web and app developers are so proficient at exploiting the reward centers of our minds. (For further reading, see Cal Newport's Digital Minimalism.) So recently i had a best buy gift card and decided why the hell not.
When i was considering "downgrading", i had to make a couple of trade-offs. i opted for a modern flip phone rather than an older model so i could easily swap in my sim card. The other reason is so that it would still have the maps app, which is the main smartphone utility i use. Also, i like to listen to music/podcasts while i'm at work. The new phone does not have a lot of storage, and there is no spotify app, so my solution is to keep my old samsung as an "ipod". i download my listening material from home and then bring it with me. What i got for the day is whatever i prepared in advance.
The new phone runs noticeably slower than my old one and i occasionally experience graphical glitches that can make the entire screen unusable. But oh, the simple joy of popping the battery out and back in for a fresh start! It's really not a problem. Texting with the numpad is obviously clunkier, but it makes me choose my words more carefully and judge when a text should really be a phone call (or face-to-face conversation). In general, i appreciate the inconveniences because the whole point of this change is to use my phone less, not more.
So how has it been overall? Honestly pretty fucking great. i worried i'd feel disconnected from the world but i haven't really missed out on much; i can still read the news or talk to people if i want to know what's going on. What has decreased is the amount of unnecessary information that passes by me. i journal a lot these days and i'm more comfortable sitting in my thoughts without external distractions. i've found that i have more time on my hands for my hobbies, and i am reading more books. my anxiety has been a lot more manageable. Maybe this choice isn't for everyone, but it feels very well aligned with the type of person i want to be. Since i switched i haven't looked back once.
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tonight i took some mushrooms and hung outside with my best friend looking at the night sky. there was some kind of astrological event yesterday so a lot of stars were visible. The lines interconnecting them were moving a little and the whole thing reminded me of a spiderweb. All of the stars were little bugs and there was an orange star (or planet. Mars?) that was the spider in the middle. though for most of the time my attention was actually on the trees. We have some tall trees in our yard and under the moonlight I could see the branches splitting into the most beautiful fractals, endlessly. (maybe i will make a page on the site for memorable shroom trips, i have had a few.)
I am thinking about changing my career trajectory. my upcoming birthday marks my transition from "early" to "mid 20s" so i figure it is now or never. though considering the field I work in, it is kind of a crazy time to do that right now. well i'm just going to keep my eyes open. i think if you're always waiting for "the right time" you might miss your chance to do anything at all.
anyway, after that i came inside the house and decided to start my website over fresh. Happy New Year! (it's March now)
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